Polyamory on the radio.Posted: May 17, 2014 Filed under: Uncategorized 1 Comment
Yesterday me, my director Jay O’Berski, and my actors Caitlin Wells and Nicola Bullock went on WUNC’s The State of Things to talk about Tarantino’s Yellow Speedo, which premieres on Thursday. The segment is here. It was my third time on the show, and I introduced my friends to my pre-show ritual of doing a headstand right before going into the studio. It gets all the blood up into the brain and makes me feel zen.
The segment went well. In live radio, though, you have to choose one direction in which to answer a question and then stride boldly until you start repeating yourself, at which point the host steps in. So of course you don’t get to talk comprehensively about your topic, or say all the things you want to say, and that’s okay. For a lot of people it was probably just their first introduction to the idea that polyamory isn’t just something immature assholes do.
But if I could have longer, and it could be edited down so that I’d sound intelligent, I’d talk about so many more things…my “conversion experience” in Belize. How love, monogamy, commitment, and sex are not bound together. How jealousy is an entirely bearable and in fact transformative experience. How everyone I’m with brings out different sides of me that I might not have ever discovered otherwise. How the emphasis on monogamy cheats both women and men. How true intimacy is possible in any relationship where kindness, honesty, and respect are present. How I feel deeply cared for, and care for others, deeply, in turn. How many dear friends I’ve made this way.
How happy I am to be a solo polyamorist.
How my saying that causes a huge range of reactions in people.
My wife and I have been poly for quite a while now and it has it’s own set of challenges. With appropriate rules and boundaries it works out for us! The initial few months were difficult, but after that things were much easier.